Showing posts with label Culinary Relaxation. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Culinary Relaxation. Show all posts

Monday, August 9, 2010

Badger Battles Coconut Dwelling Crab

With the Wolf frolicking gaily in the wilderness of the Pacific Northwest, the Badger has largely been left to his own devices. Gone are those heady days of endless plotting and counterplotting. Nearly forgotten is the relentless sense of urgency that accompanies conflict at such close quarters. What remains are the smoldering embers of a feud that once burned so hot and fast within the dense Mexican jungle.

That is not to say the danger of a raging firestorm has passed. The Tejon understands that the only thing preventing the hot coals from transforming themselves into a devastating inferno is the introduction of combustible fuel. And in this case reservoirs of potential kindling are vast.

For though the Lobo has temporarily abandoned his Caligulan compound in search of more comfortable climes, the indelible fingerprint of insanity with which he imbues his surroundings remains. Massive undertakings of marble and electricity have not been abandoned. They simply await the return of their lunatic creator.

It is in the inevitable resumption of these efforts that the Badger finds motivation to remain vigilant in the absence of his adversary. He knows that this all too brief detente will pass, and he has committed himself to ensuring a swift and calculated response to the Wolf's return.

To accomplish this goal, the Tejon has been conditioning his combat reflexes by engaging local wildlife in minor skirmishes. He actively seeks out adversaries that bite or sting or pinch and battles them into submission as a means of honing the skills so crucial in his conflict with the Lobo.

Today we find the Badger face to face with a menacing crab. He encountered the beast while gathering coconut bark for the barbecue, and not a man to simply abandon his meal at the first sight of trouble, the Tejon valiantly forced the crustacean into the shell of a burnt out coconut.

From there he gingerly avoided the crushing force of the extended claw and suavely posed for photos with his incapacitated prey. Hardly a man to induce suffering upon an innocent creature, the Badger later released the prisoner to its natural habitat.

The series of photos below depicts the Tejon as he masterfully poses with his adversary. While the Wolf idles away his time sipping cranberry juice and proselytizing his unique brand of lunacy in the western United States, the Badger remains battle ready in the jungles of Mexico. Could this be the tipping point? Only time will tell.

A Fearsome Encounter

These Claws Take No Prisoners

Hey Lil' Darlin'

Predator And Prey Strike An Accord of Peace

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Badger Battles.....Scorpion

Most readers have probably surmised that the Badger has a deep affection for eating. The photos featured in previous posts attest to this fact. What may not be so easily gleaned, however, is the fact that the Tejon enjoys preparing his food almost as much as consuming it.

Amongst other things, the ritual of fixing the evening meal offers yet another outlet through which the Tejon can slough off the accumulated daily stresses of engaging the Lobo. This part of the afternoon is generally split between quiet meditation on the day's events and relaxed speculation as to what the future might hold.

It can happen though that various forces conspire to crush the serenity of the moment. Instances where extenuating circumstances pull the Badger from the cathartic bliss of chopping vegetables or arranging coals for the grill. Though these diversions are neither welcome nor appreciated, they comprise an inevitable aspect of jungle living and thus force the Tejon to abandon his zen cocoon and reluctantly respond to the matters at hand.

Today we find the Badger in the midst of just such a scenario. In this case he has been assailed by a deadly scorpion as he prepares to light the barbecue. For most men such a discovery would not only spoil the calm tranquility of the moment, but also announce the probability of a prolonged and agonizing death. For the Tejon it is just another task preventing him from enjoying his meal. Remember, the Badger spends his days battling a foe more infernal and insidious than any scorpion.

The series of photos below depicts the Tejon as he nonchalantly faces down the formidable adversary. Watch as his combat hardened reflexes take control. Behold as he puts his most trusted ally at ease by making light of a serious situation. And finally observe him as he steals one of the Wolf's most brutal battlefield tactics and dances a brief jig on the body of his vanquished enemy.

Comfort in Charcoal


An Unwelcome Dinner Guest


Kiss of the Badger


It Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time


Dance of the Wolf: Reinterpreted